I’m in the middle of writing the book proposal for my memoir, and I’m feeling overwhelmed. Why does my story need to be told? Why will people care? I feel like I’m out in the water flapping around trying to figure out my footing. It reminds me of this time I was in Thailand.

I had hopped onto a tiny plane and headed south to Koh Samui, an island off the east coast. I rented a one room bungalow hut right on the beach. It was the best $15/ night I had every spent. Each morning I would roll out of bed, throw on my bathing suit and walk 10 steps to the warm shallow Gulf. One day I was laying on my back in the shallow waters propped up on my elbows letting the waves roll up over me, taking in the peacefulness when before I knew it a wave came and grabbed me and tossed me into a somersault below the surface. The top of my aqua blue string bikini went flying off. I scrambled to find my footing but as soon as I did another wave came and took me around again, further out into the water I went. I yelped for someone to help me but the beach was so scarce that the beachgoers down the way didn’t hear my cries.

“Miss! Miss!” I caught a glimpse of a man in the corner of my eye coming to the shoreline.

Oh thank god.

Just then the water calmed down and I caught my footing.

I pulled myself up into the shallow waters as he waded closer to me.

“Miss! Miss!”

I reached my arm out. I thought he was holding out his hand to grab mine but instead he held out something else. An arm full of tapestries for sale.

“No, no thank you.” I stood there topless covering myself with my arm and trying to catch my breath.

He snarled at me and turned away.

I don’t know what the lesson in that is. Maybe it’s that the water will calm down and I will find my footing? Anyway, wish me luck 🙂